Unit 2 - Space - Green Light Review
Links to Additional Unit Specific Posts
Unit 2 Introduction:
http://stitchshift.blogspot.com/2011/11/unit-2-space-neverending-story.html
Creative Research:
http://stitchshift.blogspot.com/2011/11/unit-2-space-creative-research-final.html
http://stitchshift.blogspot.com/2011/11/unit-2-space-creative-research.html
http://stitchshift.blogspot.com/2011/11/unit-2-space-creative-research-epic.html
Written Assignment Research:
http://stitchshift.blogspot.com/2011/11/unit-2-space-supporting-research-for.html
3D Modelling:
http://stitchshift.blogspot.com/2011/11/maya-week-1-2.html
Time Management:
http://stitchshift.blogspot.com/2011/10/unit-2-space-time-management.html
Life Classes:
http://stitchshift.blogspot.com/2011/10/unit-2-space-time-management.html
Reviews:
http://stitchshift.blogspot.com/2011/11/unit-1-anatomy-review-robert-wienes.html
http://stitchshift.blogspot.com/2011/11/unit-2-space-review-fritz-langs.html
OGR 09/11/2011
ReplyDeleteEvening Stitch - apologies for the delay!
Okay - in regard to your essay first; excellent choice, because of the clear relationship between the physical spaces and the emotional spaces of the cast. However, I do have stylistic note for you in terms of writing - and it's as true of your reviews. You have a slight tendency to 'overwrite' at times, which gives the impression of someone straining for effect and almost too keen to impress. Don't misunderstand, your clear love of language, of words is a good thing - a great thing - but sometimes when I read your work, I get an image of you walking around in your dad's clothes - an instance of aspiration not quite matched by understanding. An example - 'Stephen King's mind melee, The Shining...' I like the idea of a 'mind melee', but in the context of your written assignment and your reviews can I suggest you adopt a more objective, formal style - keep it unadorned, so when you do pull out a neat turn of phrase it really shines out, as opposed to feeling a bit exhausting for the reader. Keep your introduction nice and simple - and leave some of the linguistic fireworks for another context.
On a related matter - your OGR, though clearly the product of time spent, feels a bit over-produced this time around - with a mish-mash of presentation styles (the film-strip seems merely ornamental and competes with the thumbnails for my attention). I guess what I'm saying is expend your energy on the content - your professionalism and attention to detail is not in question, but I think you could pare it all down and go for something more sophisticated and - ultimately, more confident.
It's difficult to judge any clear direction from your thumbnails - though a word of warning about the desert of colours - that scene needs a really muscular, dynamic composition otherwise it becomes a visual blancmange. You may need to deploy some serious artistic license to guard against this scene falling flat (it has done so in previous years!).
Not sure I entirely understand your visual concept yet (again, I can't help feeling that you almost used too much language and too many references by which to express it in your OGR) - it seems to boil down to Disney without the whimsy? How about trying to get your visual concept expressed plainly in a couple of sentences?
Hey Phil,
ReplyDeleteThanks for the feedback.
RE: The written sentiments, yeah I know I dont think I'd fit in my dads clothes, anyway im going off topic.
Those brief sentiments are my own way of naturalising a review. I am trying my best to understand thematics and research sentiments so they hold context.
Forgive me but I like adding a zing, its what makes me smile while i'm writing even if its a word. You are right I'm sure, my original sense of reviewing was just to review things I hate so I could go on a crusade of ripping the hell out of them making myself laugh in the meantime. Evil? maybe but i've dumbed that down, I'm just trying to make myself smile doing a task that some consider a chore.
RE - The OGR erm okay next time I will keep it monotone. Just thought I'd try a new approach. After posting it I kinda thought the thumbs were blead out a bit. I had only mainly been focusing on the structure of buildings so the sand dunes were not as polished.
Got your point about the simplicity, I can do you one better ill explain it in the terms of an elevator pitch.
"The surrealistic structural perspective of Disney's Epic Mickey meets the atmospherics of Uncharted 3: Drakes Deception".
Thanks for the advice on stuff Phil, ill do my best to appease these requirements going forward.